Wednesday, March 21, 2012

I want to be a kite

I want to be a kite. Fly really high. Doing all the crazy things...Going where the breeze takes me...

But I want you to hold me, control me...

Pull me tight when I meet a strong wind that tries to blow me away from you...

I want you to take care of me when I'm going to crash into something.

Save me from all the obstacles...

Find me when I’m lost... I’ll be there somewhere waiting to be found...

But let me fly. Let me fly along with the birds in the sky...

It would be difficult, I know you’d want someone who can take care of herself instead, but if I made it so easy for you, would you still like the chase?

I may go into my extremes, fly so high... In the bright sunlight, you may find it real difficult to find me...

In the dark nights, you’ll not be able to spot me... I may be going crazy on a breezy day, totally out of your control...

But as long as you hold the thread, I’ll be connected to you, following you wherever you go... Trust me, I’m also chasing you...

I want you to take over completely, but yet, never let me hurt, and be the one I can blindly trust... Be the one who’d take the best decisions for me...

If I ever, accidently, hurt your hands while you’re busy taking care of me... May I be lost... Lost in a way that you never find me again...

But I know you’re stronger than I think you are...

And you will show me your strength by never letting me go...

You will let me be the person I want to be, ‘cause I’m only doing things you’d want to see... I’m flying high, but only looking for something far far away, looking for everything that makes YOU happy!

No matter what happens, please don’t leave the thread, or I may lose you forever...

And you will find me with someone else someday, not in a very good condition as I was in before, but only stitched to be used again...

Girls look like their dolls

Men always wonder why dolls are so important in a girl's life, well, here's the answer:

I heard the song “Chal Chaya Chaya”on the radio this morning and started dancing. After the song got over, the RJ took over and told his listeners that while he was busy playing this song for us, he was also dancing just like Shahrukh in his studio!

But when he said he danced just like him, I realised I did not! I was busy shaking my hips moving around the house taking tiny steps, like I was been made to dance after inserting a battery!

We all girls have had a Hula Doll with us...And we’ve always looked at her dance and copied her steps. I have been away from my Hula girl for about 14 years (I guess), but I still remember exactly how she danced and moved!
My Princess Doll

Well, the doll in the picture isn’t the Hula girl I’m talking about. She’s the Princess Doll. She was brought to me on my 13th birthday by my papa (Thank you Papa :-*)!
Since I was in a boarding School then, she decided to stay back here in my house. And I seconded her decision ‘cause in Barnes, girls would’ve destroyed her face and her hair (They would never do that to their own dolls! Would only put make up on their poor faces and make bindis on their foreheads.) I also believe that someday I’m going to marry someone and walk down the aisle with my papa wearing a dress just like hers!

This is what a doll means to a girl!

She is her sister to whom she can put a lot of makeup and some bindis to.

She is her dance teacher.

She is the sculptured form of parent’s love for their daughter.

She’s been given to a daughter after saying things like, “She looks like YOU! :D”

So she also makes her feel beautiful and like a princess.

Someday, she helps a girl plan her wedding dress...

I‘m also sure that she’s the one who reminds you about the little princess in you when you are burdened with responsibilities as you grow up and start bringing your daughter’s dolls!

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Ant in the big world

In the midst of a world full of competitions,

I'm still competing with my inner-self, trying to look for the best in me!

In the midst of a world where people are fighting to prove others wrong,

I'm fighting with myself, proving myself wrong.

Why should I be discouraged, when I know the battle hasn't even begun yet..!

In the midst of two paths, a path that would change my life forever...And a path that will only bring me regrets.

Career to me, is not just a "job". It's what I'm meant to do.

It could be anything! It could be working with an ad agency or making some feature films or working with an NGO or becoming a Journalist..!!

The list does not end here. There's a wide field open for the youngsters these days, which makes it even more confusing.

I've to make a choice this year. And it's going to be a choice between Advertisement and Journalism.

After every Advertisement lecture, I get into my college canteen, hog and go back home.

But after every Journalism lecture I go to the library, look for reference books for Journalism, read newspapers, read some good articles, look for stories, do a lot of research on them and think over and over about it to find a missing angle and research on that one as well..!!

You see, I think I'm naturally interested in Journalism.

But I'm not that spontaneous and don't have much knowledge about Politics and Sports. Two very important topics Indian Journalism deals with..!!

But the urge to do something, for not just the country, but for the world, tempts me to opt for Journalism.

But the worst part in this confusion is that my college does not provide Journalism, an option that I should have in my third year in Mass Communication.

So, even if I want to take Journalism, I'll have to change my college, which again, is next to impossible! I don't know if colleges permit admissions in the last year.

But hopefully, they will. Or I may just land up doing Advertisement and then Masters in Journalism.

Un-clear goals. Un-clear ambition. Yet smiling and ready to take challenges!

Don't know what this little ant is going to do in the huge world..!!

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Waiting for my Prince Charming

I’m longing to meet my prince charming.

But he never shows up!

My sister tells me to stop waiting, he’s going to appear when you least expect for him.

And then it happens.

I met a guy who likes me a lot. But BOOM. I don’t feel like dating him. Reasons are plenty (won’t bore you with them).

Most important reason: He's a good friend..!! He's probably just infactuated, or attracted but he's lost a friend in me now. And that's really sad..

Well, when I said  “WHAT THE HELL” outloud. My sister said, “Come on! You’re just 18! You still have to meet many people! There are many guys out there!”

Well in this generation, trust me, being single at the age of 18 is like dating at the age of 80!

But at least I’m not one of those girls who waste their time dating people they aren’t going to see forever. Of course, no one knows what’s kept in the future. You can’t have everything in a package, not at least in the un-predictable specie called, “Human”.

But at least you got to know whether whoever your spending resources like time, money and energy on, is really worth it.

So now am here...Still single...Not so ready to mingle...Hogging on Pringles!

But nevermind. guess Prince Charming is still preparing himself for me.

So I should also start working on myself, so that when he comes prepared, he finds me worth all his patience J

And I have missed blogging.  But I seriously don’t get very inspired these days. I feel I’m still too naive to handle something like “Blogger”. But I’m still trying to. If I’ve started this, I don’t think I should give up.

Am sure my readers are going to be welcoming my “once in 2 month blog” always. It’s too difficult to follow up when the blogger isn’t too regular, but I really need to find a solution to this.

Well and what’s new? This is new:

I’ve started reading Nicholas Sparks’ The Notebook. Believe me, it’s a very romantic book. I love the quotes. But being an offspring of two very UN-romantic people, I really can’t digest how love can be felt for one another even at that old an age. Guess true love exists, but only in our imagination.

But if it's for real, I’d like it to happen to me too, just like it happened to Noah and Allie!

To conclude, why the picture?
I have watched Tangled TWICE this week. And I LOVE it.

Friday, November 11, 2011

The Boot-Polisher

I saw a boot-polisher on a railway platform yesterday. Not a very weird thing, is it? We see such polishers in every nook and cranny in Mumbai.

But I've seen a polisher very happy! He sat with the stool that he uses to polish other people's boots. Kept a glass of water on it, and opened a pack of biscuits.

Trust me, I've never seen a man this happy in my life! And never seen the pleasure I seen on HIS face last night.

He very slowly dipped his biscuit in the glass of water and ate it, enjoying every bite he took. The satisfaction on his face was remarkable!

May be he likes to eat biscuits with water instead of tea. But he ate biscuits with so much pleasure at an hour when people SWALLOW their BIRYANI in a hurry to go off to sleep to work the next day!

I came back home a satisfied girl, got up this morning with a smile, that no matter what may happen, YOU got to believe you’re happy! And there! You will feel like the happiest person on earth.

My life is perfect with all the little fights I have with my sister every night, but wake up every morning with a tickle and go to work waiting to get back home to watch BigBoss with her.

My life is perfect even though I miss my beautiful family, 'cause I know they are just a Gtalk away from me!

My life is perfect with all my nagging friends, 'cause no matter how perfect you are, you need friends to look for those funny little flaws in you to pull your legs! And you need people who sit on your head and say things like, "Tu movie ke liye kyu nahi aa rahi, aana! Kya bhav kha rahi hai!" :P

My life has become even more perfect after I've started intern-ing. Now I have a responsibility, and I have people who I can ask thousands of questions to! Sometimes they look at me with an expression that scares me off, but most times they are sweet enough to answer them.

So I will enjoy every single bit of my life, just as the shoe polisher enjoyed his biscuit dipped in water!

I'm requesting everyone to do the same :-)

Miss you Bloggy friends! I wish I was more frequent with my blogs, I would've never lost my readers. But I will keep writing, 'cause am sure someone's reading these, or may read some day, sometime! May be after 100 years, and tell their children, "Oh look what we found! These are your great grandmom Khushbu's blogs! It's okay if you don't wanna read them, we don't want to either! No body ever wanted to! See, she's got no comments! Just one good friend named Rayees, seems like a sweet guy!"

Sunday, October 23, 2011

You WANT, you THINK, you HAVE!

Well, well, well, the entire collage presented to you above talks about LIFE.

When I tried googling ‘Quotes on life’, I got an un-countable list of quotes.

And whenever I read these ‘inspirational’ quotes, I land up saying, “OH MY GOSH! THESE ARE WONDERFUL!”

And trust me, they solve all your problems in seconds, right? Like, you have the answer for every problem in life.

Are you trying to say your problem is universal? So indirectly, everything that happens in your life is some way or the other similar to something that’s happening in someone else’s life?

Now, let me be frank. I’ve been going through issues, issues that never resolved but left me even more tangled!

I’ve been worried all the time about my career. A few months back, I’d thought I’d become a writer! It’s so exciting when you write a blog or a note on facebook and you get a few sweet comments that encourage you to think that you can practically become a full-fledged writer! But is it that easy when there’s a lot more audience, more readers, and many people depending on what you write and GOSH! The critics!

I’ve been told that, to be a writer, you actually need to mug up Shakespearian quotes and quotes by other famous authors!

Are you serious? I thought the art of expressing your feelings through words was being a writer!

Never mind. May be the above definition that describes a writer does not exist!

And recently, after making a short film for a project in college, I’ve had a thought of joining a film school.

So now, I’m all the more confused.

What am I?

What am I GOING to be?

Where am I going to land up?

These thoughts have constantly been on my mind since almost a year now.

If I try finding an answer to this question, all I’m going to find is the n number of quotes based on life saying, “EVERYTHING WILL FALL IN IT’s PLACE WHEN IT’s THE RIGHT TIME!”

This makes me strong, very strong!

And then there are movies, movies like Seven Pounds. Such movies make me think of joining an NGO. It makes me think I should be lecturing a bunch of underprivileged kids, who are in need of knowledge, but aren’t benefitted with any! But am I smart enough? Their lives would depend on what I say and what I do. Would I be worth that much of trust?

And then my mind tells me, ENOUGH.

Enough with all of these notions, confusions, assumptions, policies and philosophies!

So I walk towards my sister to find an answer... My sister who can talk in a language that seems foreign to any specie on Earth.

She has this one habit of talking while moving her hands in a way that seems very interesting and tells me of how sure she is about her beliefs and notions. She talks with a lot of emphasis!

For example, when I ask her a silly question like, “When am I going to meet the guy of my dreams?”

“Well, (her palms spread out to welcome mine, I hold them tight) He’s somewhere real close, baby! You just need to stop looking for him! The harder you to try looking for him, you’ll land up with all the wrong guys who aren’t worth you, sweetie!”

So much like the quote stuff, isn’t it?

Well, I can’t judge whether she’s right about ‘the perfect guy’, or not, unless I find the answer an to it. Sometimes I do believe what she says is the truth. Sometimes she says things that turns on the switched off bulb in my brain and helps me think.

The other night I argued on how much I need a life that’s more simpler for a teenager like me. I kept telling how things have been difficult. I puked out all the non-sense I had in my brains and she didn’t have an answer to all of that confusion.

So she kept talking.

She kept trying to find the right answer to all my questions.

 It’s difficult for a 21 year old to convince her 18 year old sister, you see.

But that doesn’t mean I’d ever find better answers from somebody else. No, never. Not even my mom and dad could ever be able to help me cool down the way my sister can!

So here’s what she said that night which brought me here to blog, “Look khushi, (her palms spread out to me, but this time, not to welcome mine, but to give a gesture that almost looked like she’s weighing two things in each of her palm) You’re living TWO lives, you see. This one’s the one that you’re living (raising one palm over the other), and this is the one you ‘think’ you’re living (Raising the other palm, both to the same level).”

See? How simple was it? But did I ever think of this? NO!

There’s this one life I’ve constantly thought I was living.  It’s the life where my problems are universal. It’s the place where everything can be answered with the help of quotes and where my dreams and goals are hard to find.

And the other life, is where I have problems that resolves sooner than I thought it will. Where there are people for rescue. Where my problems are just mine and where I can make my own quote after what I learnt from my experiences!

This life, carves my niche.

This life is where the solution to all my issues are the moral science lessons that I had in my 1st and 2nd grade! Here, everything I’ve learnt is from the things that got around me!

This life is my JOURNEY, the reason why I started blogging, the journey that will find it’s own destination!

So both the lives I live are important to me, ‘cause the 1st life, teaches me to reach things higher than my expectations, and the other tells me to relax, EVERYTHING WILL FALL IN IT’s PLACE WHEN IT’s THE RIGHT TIME!

Here, I, am one single person, connecting to the millions of people all around the world, making everything I say, UNIVERSAL!

Good bye dear friends, hope my blog meant something. Even if it didn’t, be nice, like you’ve always been! J :P
Thanks for the comments on my previous blog! The compliments boosted my self-esteem to a level where I went to college everyday with my spectacles on!

Friday, September 9, 2011

The Versatile Blogger

Hey friends from every where (hope your reading me and I am not addressing this to myself),

I have won the award of The Versatile Blogger! YAY! That's such a cool thing to win right? But I some how feel that I don't really deserve this love and appreciation Sarah has put upon me. I have been so unfaithful to my readers, havn't been posting updates frequently. Well, a college going girl with a house to takecare of and her assignments to complete and friends who keep nagging should be forgiven, shouldn't she? (I know that counts as a lame excuse, bloggy mommys are so fantastic and ON TIME always! They have home assignments, diaper assignments, blogging assignments, and hubby assignments, and many more, don't they? I have always appreciated their efforts on their blogs and I will do it even now! You guys are great).

There are rules for winning this award, and they are as follows:
1) Thank the blogger who awarded you and link back to them.
2) Share 7 things about yourself.
3) Pass the award along to 15 other newly discovered blogs.

Now back to the award. Well, I deserve or I don't, I have the award on my blog, so I WILL make a grateful speech.

Thankyou Sarah from People Don't Eat Enough Fudge, for thinking I am capable of this awesome award you've passed on to me along with other REALLY amazing bloggers, in front of whom I stand like an ant with absolutely no knowledge about what BLOGGING is. I am really grateful to you <3

I am also sorry to have been so late in this 'passing-on-the-award' rule, since i was busy with projects! (Please do understand this little ant).

So I have completed my very first level.

Now comes the time to say 7 things about myself. (This is going to be FUN! 'Cause there are many bloggers I've recently discovered, who know nothing about me and my fellow bloggers, will find a chance to know me even better!)

1) I am an 18 year old, who has started to look like an Cranky Old Woman (No offence to Mr. Cranky Old Man, I think you're handsome even now, and you're at some better 'stuff' than I am, so kudos to you!)

Watch the changes below!

Super terrible right? Well, this is just the physical appereance, you should watch what I do with my brains, and you will be confused of what age I actually should've been. Just 1% percent of it displays on my blogs, LUCKY ME! (Now you know why I don't blog frequently?)

Well, the above transformation is due to the huge amount of pressure I put on my brains, regarding career and 'stuff' like that!

2) I stay away from family, with my sister, the sole partner of my apartment. I miss being with my family. I meet them once every summer and the gaps are filled in by plenty of uncles and aunts, who try hard to make us feel home, but MOM is a MOM and DAD is a DAD and baby brother's shrieks can't be found any where else but only from HIS vocal chords and speaking apparatus!

My family is beautiful, I have mentioned them in almost EVERY blog, would be happy if you could scroll down and read some of those blogs.

3) I have been in a boarding school for 4 years! Yeah, it was really difficult for a kid like me, who was always a mom's tail, her sister's doll and brother's best friend, who he could play with. And dad's MOST delicate darling!

4) I am a quick thinker, which at most times, invites troubles. I am impatient for which I have been given a pearl, to wear as a pendant, by my Tarot-Reader mom. Which I think doesn't work a bit. Yeah, but it does make all the other Indians ask me, "Child, are you very restless and short tempered?". That makes me thank my mom almost a zillion times a day.

5) I can love unconditionally. I can bring a pup home, who may be suffering with cold during rains, blow-dry him with my pink dryer and clean the mess he would make in my house with a funny smile saying, "Oh my Scrappy boy! You really crap!". (I have done that in real, Scrappy blog's coming soon!)

6) I am everything my family's believed I am. I have been a dancer, 'cause my mom thought I am and she would encourage me to participate in all the dance competitions and my sister would be my make-up artist and together they made me the winner of the first price, sometimes second, but a winner!

I feel am beautiful even in the Cranky Old Woman look, 'cause my sister thinks I am. I feel am really strong within, and daintiness is just inside of my heart, only because my dad thinks so. I believe I could make a very good dummy punching bag, only 'cause my baby brother thinks I can!

7) I love every human/animal I meet. I try to find out one good quality in every person I come accross and learn something from them. For me every one and everything's a teacher. And that's why my journey will only end when I die. 'Cause there's LOTS to learn.

There's always a lot we can bitch about everyday, but a very few things that we can actually appreciate, and you practically get nothing out of the former, but a lot from the latter. Don't you think so too?

Well now you know most of me. I enjoyed being the Jenny who praised herself.

Now we move on to our next rule of this award, that is, passing on this award to my favourite 15 blogs, and it's going to be ALL the blogs that I follow. So lucky me, no picking thus no pricking!

Sarah at Ah, the possibilities!

Nita at Artistic Compostition

Glen at Glen's life

Melanie at Livin' the Dream

Maxabella at Maxabella loves...

Aakriti at Yarn of Words

Allison at Life in a pink Fibro

Carol at Naturally Carol

Pink Patent Mary Janes

Lisa at Life as we know it...

Emily at Beetle Shack (I also love the name of the blog!)

Joeh at Cranky Old man (I have joined him TODAY and read only a few of his blogs, but whatever I read, I loved! Especially the 'Having stuff' blog which apparantly got displayed in my blog too)

Felicity at Gifts of Serendipity (Gosh! Am a new follower of this amazing woman's blogs where their's a new post EVERYDAY of the week about VARIOUS kind of stuff that includes games! YEPPIE!)

Rebekah at A Buddhaful Journey (Well, am new here as well. Am having fun reading her blogs about her life with her two really handsome baby boys!)

Rebecca from Rebecca Loves!